In Memory (01 MAY 2016)

"It was the dodgiest squiddie I'd ever seen," de Matos said. She was lying in bed, her upper chest a mass of bandages, while Faber leaned against the side, listening. "It took three shots from point blank range, and still it kept coming. It was Hassan that finally put the caralho down. We were all so focused on it, we never even saw the bastardo Thin Man until he was almost on top of us. Daiwa was the first to react, but not fast enough. Huisman didn't make a sound. He just.. he.."

"Shh," Faber turned and caught de Matos' hand, lacing her fingers through it and squeezing tightly. "Monica, you don't have to talk about it right now." De Matos reached across and covered Faber's hand with her other hand, but she didn't stop talking.

"There was nothing I could do. I heard the shots and Daiwa called that it was down, but before I could even get Houston out of my way, I knew. The hole went straight through, Kevlar, alloy vest, everything. His eyes were still open. They were green. I never realized they were green." Her voice started to choke up and she finally stopped talking, as Faber leaned in to stroke her hair with her other hand, making soft soothing noises.

"But you made it count, Schätzchen," she murmured into Monica's ear. "You went on, and you put the rest of those fickeren into body bags, and you brought him home. More importantly, you brought the rest of them home alive." Faber glanced down the line, where most of the rest of the squad rested. She saw SGT Lindemann visiting with Houston and Maillet, the most severely injured of the survivors.

"Thank you, Liesel," de Matos said, pulling Faber's attention back. "Gata, could you get me some water? My throat is dry." Faber nodded, reaching out to stroke de Matos' cheek before moving away to grab the pitcher and a cup.

-

"How are they?" Constance asked. She was chafing at being stuck in medbay after her collapse, but the medics said she'd be out in a few more days, at most. Oskar came to visit her regularly, though today he'd spent most of his time visiting the member of the squad he'd just brought back from Oklahoma.

"They're very out of sorts. The pain medicine is very strong," he replied. "Still, they remember what happened."

"It was a good mission," Constance replied. When Oskar's face clouded, she said it again. "It was a good mission, Oskar. Your squad faced the biggest threat we've had, and you brought back enough materiel that the research and engineering teams are going to be busy for months."

"It was not worth the loss of a man," he replied, bitterness thickening his accent.

"It never is," she agreed. "It never is, but you're a soldier, as was Hidde. He knew what was at stake, and he made us all proud." She waited a moment, gauging the expression on his face. "So did you, Oskar. You wouldn't be wearing those stripes on your shoulders if the Commander didn't agree." She reached out for his hand, and after a moment, he extended it, letting her wrap her calloused, slender fingers around his larger hand. The contrast between her nearly black skin and his pale skin never ceased to intrigue him. She squeezed, hard, and he looked up, meeting her eyes for the first time since he'd sat down by her bed.

"It is harder, somehow," he admitted. "When I was KSK, it was human enemies. Even with the terrible things they did in Afghanistan, it wasn't so bad." Oskar clenched his fist, his jaw tightening as well, until he heard Mak make a small sound of discomfort. He relaxed his hands, and gave her an apologetic look, to which she smiled slightly. After a deep breath, he continued. "When I saw Huisman fall, I was scared," he said quietly. He glanced around to see who was near, but no one appeared to be listening in. "It was so much, I wanted to order everyone back to the LZ. We'd barely moved twenty meters, we were still outside the craft. I didn't know what else awaited within, and I didn't want anymore blood on my hands." Constance made a sound of protest, but he overrode her. "Hidde..." he paused, seeking the words. "He was quiet. Barely spoke to anyone, but always willing to help out, if needed. But on the battlefield, he was a monster. He charged in where brave men would hesitate, and he was a virtuoso with that shotgun."

"Oskar, you forget who was with you on that last mission," Constance interrupted. "I knew him, too." Lindemann nodded as she continued. "You couldn't give up, because you knew he wouldn't, in your shoes." Oskar just nodded again. He couldn't dishonor the man's sacrifice by giving up. "You know, he'd be proud of what you accomplished. This is a solid win, and Hidde's contribution helped bring it home, but it was your leadership that saw it through to completion."

Oskar just nodded again, no more words to be said. Mak seemed to know this too, and she just held his hand and closed her eyes with a small, sad smile.

-

The day room was quiet, but it wasn't empty at all. Most of the troopers were there, those not on duty or in medbay, but even the inevitable hum of packed bodies wasn't enough to cover the occasional cough. The small table by the memorial was lined with empty shot glasses, and all of the tables and chairs were occupied with small groups sitting quietly, some drinking, others talking in hushed tones, others still just sitting in silent contemplation.

Most of the troopers didn't know CPL Huisman well, but he was the first casualty since they got here. Some remembered Jensen, but they'd all been so new that his death hadn't made the same impact. Since then, there'd been injuries, even serious ones, but it had begun to seem like XCOM was invincible, that the war was inevitably theirs. Now, the reality of what they did was pinpointed by the photo on the memorial wall, and no one felt like celebrating the strategic victory that the mission represented.

Jade Colman didn't sit with any of the groups clustered around the room. She stood alone at the memorial wall, a full shot of whatever whisky had been going around clutched forgotten in her hand. She hadn't really known Hidde all that well either, but she'd been starting to. After he'd approached her the other day, she'd asked around, and learned that he didn't talk much. Most of those who'd been on mission with him expressed surprise that he'd managed to string so many words together as to actually hold a conversation, let alone the several they'd had before he'd gone on mission. She'd prattled on about rocks and geologic pressures and he'd listened without ever giving any impression that he wasn't really interested. When she'd prodded, he'd revealed small details about his life in Rotterdam, and had told her a couple stories about his brothers in Amsterdam that had her roaring with laughter. He had been a friend, and she'd thought maybe there was more.

But there was no more. Not now, not ever. No more quiet conversations. They'd never go digging around in the tunnels like they'd discussed. This was war, and war tore friends away and ended possibilities. This was the greatest enemy humanity had ever faced, and she'd be damned if Hidde died for nothing. Those bastards wouldn't win this, no matter how many others fell. With that thought ringing defiantly in her mind, Jade lifted the shot glass of whisky, raised it slightly in salute as she stared at the photograph, and drank it down in a single swallow. She placed the glass on the end of the row, then opened her other hand, looking down at what it contained. She blinked several times, then set it down on the shelf, below his picture. It was a geode, broken open so the purple and green crystalls within caught the light, casting tiny ovals of color against the wall. Jade turned away then, approaching the nearest group, who made room for her without a word. Tomorrow was another day, another battle. Tonight, however, she planned on forgetting everything.

Geodes (28 APR 2016)

PFC Jade Colman sat on her bed, towel spread out carefully below her as she worked. She picked up the knobby round rock, looking at it carefully, trying to find the right spot. After several moments of inspection, she nodded absently to herself, and picked up her rock hammer, keeping her eyes on the spot she'd selected. A couple long, slow breaths, and she brought the hammer down sharply, hearing the satisfying crack as the stone split, exactly where she'd wanted it to. She brushed the chips off of her lap, and picked up the stone to look at the freshly revealed inner surfaces.

Just as she'd expected, it was a geode, with traces of amethyst inside. She held it up, letting the overhead light catch on the tiny crystalline points inside, sparkling brightly. As she turned it back and forth, she heard a polite cough behind her. She set the stone down and turned her head to find one of the other troopers standing a respectful distance away.

"Can I help you, Corporal?" she asked.

"I did not wish to interrupt," he said somewhat diffidently, with a small smile. "I've noticed your small collection, and wanted to see how you do them."

"Oh, quite alright," she replied, smiling. "It's always nice to share my hobby." She flipped back the towel, and gestured toward the foot of the bed. "Have a sit, and you can look at this beauty I just opened up." The Corporal sat down, and she caught a glance at his nametape. Huisman. She'd seen him around, and he'd just come back with de Matos on the mission before hers. She'd heard he'd been quite the gung-ho on that mission, but in person he seemed kind of shy. She handed him the half-geode she'd just been examining, and he took it carefully, raising it to the light as she'd done.

"How do you know what will be in it?" he asked as he looked at the crystals. "The outside looks like any other stone."

"Well you never really know for sure, until you break it open," she said. "But you can usually tell a good candidate." She reached out, touching the backside of the stone he held in his hand. "Do you see here, how it's knobbed and bumpy? That, and its mostly round shape are good indicators that it's a geode."

"It is very pretty inside," he said quietly. "You wouldn't expect it with the boring exterior."

"Oh, rocks and minerals aren't boring," Jade said, excitedly. "There's just so much that most people don't realize." He turned his eyes toward her, lifting a brow and smiling slightly. Jade blushed a little. She'd often had this problem, most people weren't quite so enthusiastic about rocks. Still, he didn't seem like he was mocking her, so she continued in a more calm tone. "The processes to create various stones and such are interesting to me. For instance, you know how a diamond is formed?"

"I have read in school that they come from coal," he said.

"That's not actually true. Coal forms when carbon, from some sort of living thing, like a plant, is buried before it can decay, and then compressed over a long time into coal, which is why it burns so well. Diamond, on the other hand, is usually formed much deeper than you'll find coal, and are usually much older than the history of plant material." Huisman's gaze did not waver, but Jade started to feel a little self-conscious, and smiled and waved it off. "It's not interesting to everyone, but it's been a hobby of mine since I was a child."

"I did not know about that," Huisman said. "I am usually interested in pretty objects, so your collection of stones and crystals caught my eye. My mother used to collect such things when I was a child, back in Rotterdam."

"Oh, I got the love of stones from my father," Colman replied. "He was a geologist, always assumed I'd follow in his footsteps."

"But you became a soldier, instead?"

"Surprised everyone," she confirmed. "Even myself, a little bit."

"Why is that?" he asked, setting the rock down on the towel to listen.

"Well, I was in college, studying geology. I had a fiancé, had even moved into his flat. The future seemed pretty clear."

"So why did you enlist?"

"It was few years ago," she said, her eyes going unfocused. "I was on Easter holiday in southern France, when Merah shot and killed several people in Montauban and Toulouse. I had actually been in the shopping center the day before the attack in Montauban. It made it seem quite personal, you understand."

Huisman nodded. "So, you enlisted after that?"

"Yes," she said, her eyes coming back to the present. "I will tell you, my father and my fiancé did not take it well."

"Did you end up marrying him anyway?"


"No," she said, shaking her head and smiling wryly. "As it turned out, a girl in the Army was a little too much for his sensibilities. Last I heard, he married a first-year, who's already given him a daughter."

"Not your dream, I take it."

"Not even a little," Jade laughed. "Even if I hadn't joined up, I still would have wanted to travel, and continue my studies."

"I hear that there are a few troopers alive because of you, from that drop in Toulouse." Huisman said. Jade blushed again, but didn't bother to hide the pride in her eyes.

"Oh my, that was certainly different than my last visit, yes. A couple of the squiddies had grabbed Yusuf and Donohue. I took care of them." There was a certain malicious satisfaction as she spoke, and it made Huisman smile, and Jade smiled back.

"I'm glad you didn't settle down to be a geologist."

"Me too!"